AVAHS – Christmas Comes to Pac-Land Review

Plot: Santa crashes his sleigh in Pac-Land – a place that has never known Christmas. As Santa and his reindeer recover in Pac-Man’s house, the Ghosts help themselves to Santa’s sack of toys.

Breakdown: Gather ‘round kids. I’m going to tell you about this game called Pac-Man. It’s about a sentient ball addicted to drugs. All day, every day, he would just suck down tiny yellow pills. A group of four people that he hallucinated to be ‘ghosts’ constantly tried to chase him down to give him an intervention. When he took what he’d called “power pellets” he’d suddenly become very aggressive and murder the ‘ghosts’ by eating them alive. Once the effects of the “power pellets” wore off, he’d go back to pill popping. But then he’d be horrified to find that the ‘ghosts’ he’d just murdered had returned; perpetually haunting him to help get him to rehab and receive the help he so desperately needed.

Sadly, however, the 256th time he went through this harrowing cycle, he suffered from an overdose which broke his perception of reality. The ‘ghosts’ finally caught him, but it was too late. His final words were “Weeooeeooeeooee Bwoip Bwoip.”

But before his untimely death, he helped save Christmas!

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With drugs! 😀

Pac-Man loaded up Santa’s reindeer with “power pellets” and they were juiced up enough to get Santa through all of his deliveries on Christmas night, even though he was really far behind.

Also, Pac-Man’s dog sounds like Donald Duck and one of the ghosts broke a mirror inside of himself.

Oh hey there, Elephant in the Room! Been a while since I’ve seen you.

“Uhh, yeah. Just thought I’d check in and read your latest review….got a little concerned….Twix…are YOU on drugs right now?”

What? Of course not!

“How long did you giggle when the line “Guess he never found Santa’s sack.” came up?”

……Just a few minutes.

“Are you seeing an elephant right now?”

…..Wha–….What?

Eh….what the…??

……………………………………I’m uh….I’m gonna go to bed.

Oh yeah, the special’s okay. Predictable, but kinda fun….Nostalgic, of course. Cheap animation – Hanna/Barbera and whatnot, but it has its charms.

Peace out, and don’t do drugs – do hugs.


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4 thoughts on “AVAHS – Christmas Comes to Pac-Land Review

  1. The Pac-Man junkie jokes were just priceless. Hahahahaha! It’s also no wonder why the rapper Pusha T used Pac-Man as a metaphor for drug usage in his verse for Kanye West’s “Mercy” song. The way you described the Christmas special and formatting the review was all too hilarious.

  2. I once saw an arcade game called Pac-Man Jr., and in the attract mode for the game, there’s a cutscene where Pac-Man Jr. is delivered by stork, though I forget to whom he was delivered. From this game, we can assume that all Pac-People (or whatever they’re called) are delivered by stork. So, no pregnant Ms. Pac-Men.

    Also, if you want a different but equally horrifying take on Pac-Man, go watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RR2dlAnP0-I&ab_channel=TerminalMontage. Heck, go watch TerminalMontage’s entire channel. His animated videos are really good.

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