Animating Halloween | Hell Girl: Three Vessels Episode 8 – Neighbor Review

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Plot: Mioi adores her dog, Momo, but her neighbor, Shintani, isn’t nearly as fond of him.

Breakdown: Aurghghghghghghghghghg…..

The next episode preview for this one started with “So you really like dogs?” And I immediately noped. If you know me, you know the animal abuse stuff is a touchy subject with me. I absolutely hate watching or reading anything that has to do with animals suffering or dying. So, please bear with me as I skim through some of this episode.

*one episode watch and some fast forwarding later*

Oh good. After a legitimately interesting, sad and high-quality episode, we’re back to unpleasant goofy bullshit.

Actually, it’s pretty much recycled unpleasant goofy bullshit because this might as well be The Distant Room Next Door from Two Mirrors melded with Bound Girl from season one.

The client this episode is Mioi. She is a spoiled rich airhead who coddles her beloved chihuahua, Momo. She gets on the bad side of the target, Shintani, after she shares that she has the same pretty expensive bracelet that Shintani has only she decided to make it into a collar for her dog.

After that, Shintani wants to get her to either move out of the apartment complex (dogs aren’t allowed in their complex, but they hardly ever get reported unless they’re a nuisance) or get rid of the dog. She has another run-in with Mioi, this time a bit worse, where she backhandedly insults her shoes without really realizing it, also flaunting how rich she is without realizing it, and then Momo pees in her arms in the elevator, accidentally getting pee on Shintani’s shoes.

Once this happens, Shintani goes out of control with her vendetta against Mioi and Momo. She coats the stairs in pee and blames it on Momo (Where she got the urine, I don’t want to know.) she records Momo barking for a bit then plays it throughout the hallways of the complex in the middle of the night at a high volume. She dumps her kitchen trash on Mioi’s veranda so it stinks up the joint. She starts wailing on the walls to scare them, she spreads terrible rumors about Mioi throughout the complex and she’s just overall being a cunt.

Now, while she doesn’t reach Meiko from Bound Girl levels of laughably horrible dog-hating villainess, she does aspire to be. Yup, she laughs as she concocts a plot to try to murder the poor dog via poisoning. And when Mioi pleads at Shintani’s door, she just kicks the door over and over in response.

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We actually get a jump scare when Mioi ominously pops up in front of the peephole when Shintani looks through it to see if she’s gone….weird spot to have one of the very few jump scares in the series, but okay.

For the record, Momo is alive and got treated at the vet, but still, Mioi has had enough and calls on Hell Girl.

The next day, Mioi heads out for another vet visit with Momo when she sees a notice from a delivery service saying they missed her and they left her package with Shintani.

Thus begins utter stupidity.

I want you all to keep in mind that I’m not kidding – or drunk – as I describe all of this climax.

Shintani is on the roof with the package. It’s a box of potty training pads for Momo. Shintani mocks Mioi saying she doesn’t need them for a dead dog, but Mioi reveals that Momo’s not dead.

Shintani legit grumbles over her foiled plans and giggles about the pain and suffering she caused anyway. Then she grabs the potty training pads and mockingly throws them all over the roof, telling Mioi to pick them all up before they fly away.

*deep sigh*

She does…..

*deeper sigh*

One of them is right on the edge of the roof, but she can’t reach it because there’s a barrier….

*massive sigh*

So she jumps the barrier…..

Because, ya know, it’s not like she’s filthy rich or lives in the city and can easily go to a store and get more potty training pads. It’s not like she doesn’t have a huge stack of them in her arms right now and absolutely doesn’t need that ONE potty training pad, nor would there be any number of potty training pads hanging over the edge of the building that would be worth risking her life for. It’s also not like what she’s doing right now isn’t just bending over and giving Shintani exactly what she wants.

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Oh and then she falls off the roof.

Hang on, hang on, I’m nowhere near done.

She manages to hold on for a second, and…Momo rushes in…carrying the straw doll. Mioi pulls the string before falling….

Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for the stupidest, goofiest most nonsensical and WTF hell torture of the entire franchise so far?

Let’s go.

The hell torture starts out with Shintani piloting a mech.

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Should I even continue? It definitely wins the title already.

Alright, as you wish.

The mech is poked in the back by a chihuahua mech piloted by Hone Onna who then attacks her with an onslaught of garbage bags. Three other chihuahua mechs pop up piloted by the rest of the hell team, and then they attack her with…well, they call it ‘water from a tank’, but it’s clearly yellow colored, so I think they were really shooting pee at her.

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After her mech is destroyed by the golden shower attack, she tries to yell at them, but finds that she can only bark.

Ai comes and takes her to the ferry. In the ferry, Shintani can still do nothing but bark, and now she’s….being absorbed by the potty training pads!??

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Iusdhdfhdsfhsdfasdasdasdheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee??!?

Ai mentions the super absorbency of the pads…and then she gets doggy ears, which is adorable, but also what the fuck?

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Cut to a hospital where Mioi is shown to have survived her wounds somehow. It was a friggin’ five story drop, but okay. Yuzuki is in the room with her—Oh yeah, she’s in the episode too. She found Momo when he was lost at the start of the episode and she’s just kinda been watching shit happen like usual. Mioi goes on about how Momo must be lonely without her.

The end.

Wow…Just…just wow. I never expected to see an episode so jaw-droppingly stupid that I was actually fairly distracted away from the animal abuse. Can I even add anything after all of that?

Uhh….let’s see. How about, who the hell hates dogs and yet gets an expensive bracelet with the lone charm being a bone?

Mmm, what else? Oh yeah, Kikuri was back to ultra annoying bitch mode as she harassed poor Momo, wanted to EAT HIM and mocked Mioi as she was walking with a sick Momo.

And uh….that’s about it.

I have a headache.

Rating: 1/10 Purely because of doggy/kitty eared Ai and the sheer WTFery at the end.


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