SSBS – Medabots Episode 4: The Legendary Medafighter

Plot: Ikki and Erika head to a fancy school for rich kids in order to find the mysterious undefeated Legendary Medafighter.

Medabot Debuts:

Neutranurse: A NAS Medabot, Neutranurse is based on a nurse. It has massive healing capabilities and a Holy Wall ability that creates an impenetrable shield for a short while.

Sumilidon: An STG Medabot, Sumilidon is based on a saber-toothed tiger. Its right arm holds the flexor sword, which is a series of three long claws extending from its wrist. It can utilize this part to also create an attack called the Shadow Sword. Its left arm has a Straw Hammer attack. Finally, its head part creates traps.

Gloomeg: A GLM Medabot, Gloomeg is based on a stone statue and specializes in missiles.

Robattles:

Koji vs. Eddie: Winner – Koji (No parts are exchanged due to refusal.)

Ikki vs. Koji: Interrupted – no winner.

Breakdown: Ikki is on his way to school when he’s suddenly ‘saved’ from an oncoming slow-moving tiny car by a girl named Karin. She goes to Rosewood Academy, a nearby private school for super rich kids. Ikki is initially annoyed by her, but when he gets up close to her, he finds himself smitten. However, she runs off before he can talk to her more.

Two things about this – One, why is that little car allowed on public roads? And two, does this show have cartoon physics or not? Because Ikki was just slammed so hard into that wall that he left a massive crater.

Back at school, Erika is telling the tale of the Legendary Medafighter and his undefeated Medabot. She also, for some reason, has red marks under her eyes. Given the scary story motif, I think they were gunning for shadows, but they’re clearly red. It looks like she’s either blushing too hard or got very specifically placed sunburns.

Not much is known of this Legendary Medafighter except he supposedly goes to Rosewood Academy. Since Metabee is itching to fight the Legendary Medafighter and Ikki wants to see Karin again, he asks if he can go with Erika while she investigates the place for an expose.

Is Ikki now allowed to bring Metabee to school? Because he’s clearly right there in the open talking to other students. Last episode seemed to imply that Coach Mountain was still being super strict about not allowing Medabots on school grounds.

They arrive at Rosewood, where the gates to the school are massive and made of 24k gold. I get that this place is meant for the super rich, but you don’t have to be super gaudy too.

They see a kid being thrown out of the school for not being rich enough to attend, so they decide to disguise themselves as students to get in.

Oh excuse me, did I say they disguise themselves as students? I meant they dress up Metabee like an idiot and pretend he’s a student while Ikki and Erika try to walk in dressed in their street clothes with only a Rosewood backpack to indicate they’re students.

Where did they get this stuff? Is there a gift shop outside?

Believe it or not THAT. WORKS.

The guy only asks where Ikki and Erika’s uniforms are, and they say they spilled caviar on them and the butler had to clean them for later.

Is school even in session right now? Because if it is, Ikki and Erika (as well as the Screws, because they’re following them) are skipping school.

The same trick doesn’t work for the Screws, who didn’t even get Rosewood backpacks (again, where did they get those?) but they do make the scene kinda funny by claiming they spilled caviar on their butler.

Back with Ikki and Erika, who have somehow switched out their backpacks for plain ones (Did they just get stickers or something? I am way too confused about the origins of this Rosewood stuff.)

So the school is actually way the hell away from the main gate. It’s through a dense forest, over numerous mountains, and after that there’s a lake and the school is on an island in the middle of that lake.

Obviously, it’s an insanely long walk for the kids to get to the school, and they ask themselves how these hoity-toity rich kids get to school everyday since they can’t imagine they’d walk. A helicopter shows up, which you’d think would be the answer, but a person on a loudspeaker tells them to land because commuting by helicopter is against school rules.

It’s later revealed that they do drive and take horses and stuff to and from school, but then why have they not come across any when they’ve been following the road?

Then…..*sigh* Then they meet Eddie and his Gloomeg Medabot. He and Gloomeg have been trapped on Rosewood’s lands for two years trying to find the Legendary Medafighter.

And yes.

That is as dumb as it sounds.

Two years?

TWO YEARS!?

How has this guy been lost in Rosewood’s property for two years and not ever have anyone find him? Especially when the property is covered in stuff like a golf course, tennis courts and a friggin’ amusement park? How do they not have cameras set up everywhere? Especially considering, as we learn upon meeting Eddie, that Rosewood’s property is littered in traps to keep intruders out. Do they not regularly check these traps? Because Eddie admits that he keeps getting caught in them. Did the girl from that Pokemon sanctuary Bulbasaur came from grow up to build these traps so she could continue her string of negligent homicide?

Not just that, but his parents have to be worried sick. Do Medabots not have some sort of tracking device or interface for communication?

A horse drawn carriage arrives on scene because Ikki and Eddie are making a ruckus because Eddie thinks Ikki’s the Legendary Medafighter and wants to fight him. If that’s all it takes to get someone’s attention, there’s even less reason that Eddie is still lost in here. Unless he’s such a stubborn idiot that he’s never looked for a way out, in which case, I’ll just stop watching the episode altogether because he is far too stupid of a human being to waste any of my brain cells caring about what he does in this episode.

In the carriage is Koji and his terrible voice acting. Koji snootily tries to make the boys stop fighting, but Eddie, somehow knowing Koji is a Medafighter, challenges him to a match.

Koji accepts and summons Sumilidon. The match is pretty quick as Sumilidon’s speed and agility allow it to easily dodge Gloomeg’s missiles and get several strikes in. Koji is the winner, but he doesn’t take any parts since he has too many as it is. With a literal twinkle of his not-drawn teeth, Koji leaves. Eddie follows because he wants a rematch, and Erika and Ikki try to follow too, but Karin pushes them out of the way and into a hole.

Erika’s pissed, but she soon realizes why she pushed them.

The ELEMENTARY school grounds aren’t just littered in net traps – they’re also covered in spear gun traps and bear traps.

Is that a butcher knife?

How is Eddie still alive with all of his limbs after spending two years wandering around this death trap? How is this place even still open? Jesus.

Karin: “You’re that boy from yesterday.” Yesterday?….Wasn’t it just this morning? I didn’t see any noticeable passage of time.

Ikki’s name is really a problem when he introduces himself. “I’m icky.”…It’s supposed to be pronounced ‘Eek-ee’ I can understand the former is just a more common English way to say that word, but either pronounce it correctly to stop calling the poor kid ‘icky’ or, and I don’t like suggesting this, just change his name for the dub.

Also, how did Karin get here? At least they show Koji having a horse and buggy. Karin just came out of nowhere in the middle of this mess of land.

Karin leads them to some boats to access the island that the school is on. I refuse to believe that these rich kids only get to the school via row and paddle swan boats. There has to be some motorboats or yachts around here.

Ikki and Karin are in a row boat while Erika and Metabee are in a paddle swan boat. Karin suddenly looks at the water, making the boat creek a little, causing Ikki to rush her, thinking she’s going to fall out. He overshoots, however, and ends up in the water. Turns out, nothing was wrong….

Ikki: “Karin, what was that all about?”

Karin: “I thought I saw a penny at the bottom of the lake. *sigh* A penny. Boy, I could sure use that.”

…….*deep breath*

*sigh*

I don’t have the patience for this right now, so here’s a ranting lightning round.

– The lake is way too deep and you’re all out way too far for you to see anything at the bottom.

– Let alone a penny.

– Ikki looks at her with a -_- face like she did something wrong, but he overreacted over her just looking to the side of the boat. Her reasons were stupid, sure, but she didn’t gasp or freak out or anything.

– No one, not even the dirt poorest person in the world could ‘sure use a penny.’

– Because pennies are useless.

– They never explain why she wanted this penny. No reason would be satisfying, most likely, but still, why did she want a penny?

– You have to be one of the richest people in the country to even go to this ridiculous school – why the fridge do you need a penny?

– Even if you did somehow see a penny, then what? You call a scuba team and pay them a few thousand dollars to retrieve it, never getting the bitter irony of the situation?

They reach the castle of a school, and Erika starts interviewing the students for info on the Legendary Medafighter. As expected, they all just know stuff based on rumors. It starts out normal enough, with some of them arguing over which Medabot he uses. Then it gets weirder with people exclaiming he’s over eight feet tall. Then it’s gets stupid with people saying he’s not eight feet tall – he actually has eight feet growing out of his head, which goes even further and stupider by other kids saying they’re all left feet and he has to buy 16 pairs of shoes when he goes shopping (is it even necessary to buy shoes for feet that are on your head? Also, they’re forgetting his regular feet – so 17 pairs of shoes…)

Ikki notices Karin mopping. She’s made fun of a little by some snotty girls who really only make fun of her by pointing out what she’s doing in one of those snotty bitch voices.

Bitch: “Don’t forget the toilet. I clogged it.” Yes….you’re so intimidating by admitting that you dropped such a massive load that you clogged the toilet. What an effective bully you are.

Ikki asks her why she’s cleaning, and she happily explains that it’s just something she does. Ikki instantly believes she’s super poor. She can’t afford the tuition, which is why she cleans the school and was trying to get the penny out from the lake.

Let me spoil this for you right now. She’s not poor. She’s just a ridiculously overly kind airhead.

Ikki is an idiot for even thinking this for a second. Why would any dirt poor kid go to one of the most expensive schools in existence? Unless they got a free ride for some reason (And I doubt that here because this is just an elementary school), that’s a horribly irresponsible thing to do. Not to mention impossible. If these middle class kids can’t even fathom being able to afford this school, no poor person, no matter how many pennies they pluck out of lakes, would ever be able to.

And I must reiterate, even poor people wouldn’t really care about a single penny no matter how hard up they are for cash.

Through some more of some of the most painfully bad voice acting I’ve ever heard (please stop it) some boys ‘coerce’ her into giving them her lunch and dessert, which she happily gives away for also no real reason.

Erika shows up claiming that the latest batch of rumors state that the Legendary Medafighter is connected with a ‘maiden’ who is super sweet and has her hair up in pigtails.

They don’t.

Even glance.

At Karin.

They get frustrated because apparently that description could apply to thousands of girls in the school, but I only saw one other girl so far who had pigtails.

Eddie, who is in the vicinity, happens to overhear this and, having a working brain, does instantly connect the dots that it’s Karin.

After a very awkward moment, complete with awkward silence, happens between Karin and Ikki, she picks up a rose and pricks herself on the thorns that the art department couldn’t be bothered to draw.

Ikki does the laziest job tying the handkerchief Karin gave him earlier onto her supposedly injured hand. Look at how loosely that’s tied. That’s not helping anything. Also, she just poked her finger, she doesn’t need a whole-hand tourniquet.

Ikki: “Wow, she’s SO pretty.” Deep into the mind of a young boy this piece of wisdom comes.

Koji shows up, wanting to protect Karin from Ikki.

Erika: “Hey look, it’s that rich guy!” Literally every person in this school is rich….

Koji goes on a tangent about knowing Karin since he was in kindergarten and how he won’t let Ikki put his filthy hands on her.

Oh excuse me, I meant to say…

Koji: “I’ve had my eye on Karin since kindergarten. I’m the one who had to grow up with her through those awkward years. You think you can walk in here and lay your unmanicured hands on her?! Think again, groundling!”

So, treating Karin like property, like you had dibs on her, like you’re entitled to her because you ‘had’ to grow up with her, acting like her ‘awkward years’ were a particular burden on you, acting like a condescending twat to a guy based on your financial standing merely because he was trying to help your precious Karin not bleed – Full fledged asshole. Got it.

Mr. Referee comes out dressed in a suit of armor…for…some reason, and Ikki and Koji have a robattle.

Sumilidon is too quick for Metabee and slashes him in the back.

Ikki: “MeTAbee!” I know I can’t convey in text how awkwardly lines are delivered, but he emphasizes the ‘ta’ way too sharply here.

Ikki says Koji is really advanced and that he’s never battled anyone like him just because he thought to attack from behind….how novel.

After some grappling and quick shots, Koji becomes equally impressed by Ikki, stating no one’s ever lasted this long against him, especially with an outdated Medabot.

Suddenly, Karin is kidnapped by Eddie who is using her as bait to lure out the Legendary Medafighter. He doesn’t really intend on hurting her, he’s just desperate to fight the Legendary Medafighter or else he’ll have to admit the last two years of his life have been a waste.

Koji and Ikki, again, both deny that they’re the Legendary Medafighter (And if it was Koji, he’s already lost to him once, sooo…) However, once he starts yelling out his demands over a bullhorn, literally every (poorly drawn) guy in the school comes to Karin’s aid.

Seriously, look at the guy directly behind Ikki. He looks like he was carved out of a potato.

They all summon their Medabots and kick Eddie’s ass. Karin comes in to defend Eddie, somehow untying herself I think? She summons her Medabot, Neutranurse, to the scene to heal the damaged Gloomeg, which never made an ounce of sense to me. These are robots with dents and scratches and broken parts. You shouldn’t be able to heal physical damage with some magical light.

What makes even less sense is that it seemingly also heals Eddie of his wounds! What the hell!?

Ikki’s shocked that she’s a Medafighter, which at least makes a little sense because she didn’t have her watch on, but that just makes me question why she didn’t have her watch on this whole time. Koji exclaims that no one can defeat Karin, and her Wiki backs this up. She’s undefeated because, no lie, she’s so sweet and kind that no one has the heart to attack her, which just makes me physically ill. I don’t remember hating Karin in the past, but I think it’s inevitable.

Erika deduces that Karin is actually the Legendary Medafighter, and, yeah, she’s right. I have no clue how this rumor got started, though. Was someone just so ashamed of ‘losing’ to Karin that they came up with some silly story of a mysterious powerful guy?

As Ikki, Erika and Metabee leave, they’re stopped by Karin’s massively long pink, because of course it’s pink, limo, (She was with Ikki and Erika on the regular grounds before but there was no limo – why didn’t she have it then?), and offers them a ride.

Karin: “There’s plenty of room as long as you don’t mind sitting in the Jacuzzi.” That limo is ridiculously long even for a limo. No one else is in the limo. There’s no way there aren’t more actual seats in there – you just wanted to mention that you have a Jacuzzi in your limo.

Ikki: “Karin, you’re rich!?” Oh for god’s sake, Ikki…Even if you held that stupid belief for that long, surely realizing that she owns a Medabot should be enough to prove she’s not poor. Even you couldn’t afford your own Medabot, Ikki.

Koji: “Come on, Karin. Let the commoners walk. They like the exercise.” He legit called them commoners….Ya know what’s even worse, though?

Karin: “Oh really? I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to interrupt.” She. Believes. Him. Are ‘commoners’ so foreign to you that you can’t even work your brain past a statement like that?

Also, you know what I hate? Super kind cutesy characters who don’t point out when other characters are insulting each other because apparently they’re so kind that they’re also oblivious. From Koji calling Ikki a groundling to a commoner, Karin doesn’t ding Koji for it or defend Ikki – she just goes about her day with that big ol’ smile.

Anyway, all of them have to walk the rest of the way because Koji’s an ass and Karin’s an idiot. Meanwhile, the Screws are damned to walking the grounds of the school for all eternity.

The end.

————————————-

I really want to reach a point where I can end a Medabots review without feeling the need to say ‘This episode is bad.’ At a certain point, it just makes me feel like I’m being a jerk, but…yeah, this episode is bad.

The concept of a mysterious undefeated Medafighter is alright, and so is the episode baseline of trying to find him, but every step along the way was really infuriating.

The school was way too over the top to the point where it didn’t even make logical sense for rich kids (Even traveling by carriage or car, there are mountains to traverse on their property to get to the lake’s edge, and you still need to seemingly take a row or paddle boat to get to the actual school. It would take way too long to get to school. You’d have to wake up at 4AM to be there on time. And let’s not even talk about the lethal traps they lay everywhere.)

Eddie’s story was terrible. He really couldn’t reach the school in over two years? Why didn’t he just follow the road? How is he not dead with all of those traps around? How did no one on security detail ever find him? In addition, it’s pretty sad (read: pathetic) that his two year trek to find and challenge the Legendary Medafighter amounted to him finding a girl who is literally unbeatable because, gosh darn it, she’s just so swell.

I am really interested to see a scene with him reuniting with his parents. They’ll be bawling and hugging him and then they finally ask the million dollar question – where have you been? And then he’ll explain he was stupidly chasing after a Legendary Medafighter in the woods of some snob school for two years, wouldn’t find his way back home….and then they put him up for adoption.

Seriously, imagine being that kid’s parents while hearing that explanation and try not to see a white flash of rage.

Then there’s Koji and Karin….ugh. Koji is a stuck up prick, and Karin’s an overly saccharine perfect (to the point where her Medabot is basically a literal angel – look at that last screencap, come on) idiot who I can definitely see making my blood pressure go up in future episodes. It doesn’t help that she’s the typical oblivious center to a love triangle – IE two of the main characters constantly fighting over her.

Even the robattles in this episode weren’t that good. The first was completely one-sided and the second ended prematurely. I did like the sudden flood of Medabots in the end (Didn’t realize so many of them could fly/hover), but they were so briefly shown that I couldn’t really see them too well. Then there’s the logistics of how Neutranurse even works, and I don’t want to bother trying to do the mental gymnastics for that one.

Pile on all the other little nonsensical details I’ve listed here, and it’s just a largely unpleasant episode. I will say that they got me with the twist. I didn’t expect Karin to be the Legendary Medafighter, but that positive is put into question because the reasons behind her undefeated record are irritating.

Sumilidon is pretty cool, and that’s pretty much all I have left in the positives department.

Next episode, beach…stuff…I guess.

…Previous Episode

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